Welcome friend to this futile yet extraordinary piece of art. I, Phineas Clockword, take the cumbersome burden that the responsibility of letting you further into these pages bestows upon me. But let’s make some things distinct.
First of all I don’t know who you are, thus we are not friends, so I’ll just call you stranger for the sake of politeness you possess to actually waste time on such a trivial read.
Secondly I’m not really named Phineas Clockword, that is just a name I chose for myself since my real name is neither that cool sounding nor granting me that veil of mysteriousness this one enfolds. (plus you get to wonder why did he choose this? Does it mean something? And such barren thoughts).
Enough of me though, I bet my hat you have more useful things to meddle with, than read me babbling incomprehensively about exorbitantly magnified raphanus sativus. Have a nice day and let the poo stay true!