Comments by P.H.Clockword on stuff

On Creativity

Be creative.

On Time Travel

The future is uncertain. I went there and I personally asked it. It is confused whether it is really the future or the future present, which makes it more of another present than actually the future. Same goes for the past, but it's convinced that's it's a tense and not a time. I don't recommend it. Bottom line is.

On God

Version one was the biggest mistake I ever made. It had a lot of bugs and really, wasn't ready for release. Thankfully, due to your continuous support and feedback version two is and will continue to be - despite the beliefs of several skeptical infidels, working as intended.

On Babies

Delicious!

On Coconuts

Coconuts are the best breed of scientists as their achievements have surpassed all the others' in the fruit world. Their skills in art and fruitosophy are not mere either and to quote the revered fruit cake professor Coco the Nut: “What is brown and hard on the outside, if not acknowledged fruitless, it can prove white and milky on the inside”

On Death

Not the most pleasant guy to hang around with. He has a morbid sense of humor and a lack of basic personal hygiene. Many phobias and complexes too. Once I told him, after he confessed to me about his fear of reapers: “Hey Death, don't fear the reaper”. And next day he got up early and went to the store where he bought a chainsaw, which made his job a bit more expensive but much more relaxing.

On People

People are strange when you're a stranger and strangers when you are strange. Still I prefer coconuts.

Of Wood, Voodoo and Llama (Part at Last)

Woodsie Woodsie Die Woodsie got up.

With heavy steps he approached the great tree, picked up the tomahawk and held it in his blackened hands. The rain kept falling in the jungle, soaking everything in a murky veil. Echoes of thunder came from the distance, as white cracks of light formed on the horizon. He loosened his grip on the tomahawk and let it slide down in his hand. It fell with a thud and hammered the ground with its weight.

Of Wood, Voodoo and Llama (Part the Third)

And so The Three began their pilgrimage to find Oji and seek his help.

The problematic part of this quest though, was locating his hut. Oji was a curious creature who had a really short attention span and an aversion to monotony. That taken into account, it's justified why he moved his house from place to place whenever he felt like, making it really difficult for anyone to contact him. But the three pilgrims were old friends of Oji. Back in the Days of Awesome he had shared with them words of voodoo and a handful of his secrets. He had taken each one separately and trusted them with knowledge concerning the locations of three hidden doorbells.

Of Wood, Voodoo and Llama (Part the Second)

After a long journey, having left behind him a trail of bleak desolation, the demon arrived at the rims of the Amazon jungle. He took a deep breath and filled his lungs with the perfume of moist wood. A cold silence spread among the dim lit brushes and the vine-wrapped trees – the jungle was aware of his presence.